We surveyed fellow Floh Members to gain an insight into what matters to them in an online dating profile. Although many of the below points should be obvious, they are key, and therefore worth repeating.
Your Photograph: First Impressions Matter
Let’s face it – we all want to feel attracted to our partners, and in the online dating world, the right photo is important. It’s not about having supermodel good looks: beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and the right photograph will hint at aspects of your personality, which may draw someone in to find out more.
“A profile with a decent picture or two shows that she is confident about her appearance,” writes one Floh member from Bangalore. “Also the kind of pictures used is important – it doesn’t have to be posing next to one of the seven wonders of the world, or any exotic locale. A profile shot that shows you for what you are is ideal.”
Excessive selfies and group shots are not a great idea, and neither are images that are blurred or too tiny to see. Many people won’t click further if they do not have a clear idea of what the person looks like, because at that point you start to wonder what the other person is trying to hide.
Write your Profile – and Write It Properly
How you write your online dating profile gives the reader a good idea who you are. Although the person on the other end may find you physically attractive, without this, they have no idea whether the two of you would be able to have a conversation.
A surprising number of people on online dating platforms, do not bother with this detail, though it is important. “A blank bio can be a major put off as that creates a whole sense of doubt,” says one Member from Mumbai. Proper spelling and grammar also goes along way. He adds: “Awful English like “Ma Lyf” “wE DiN” etc. which throws several questions on maturity levels of the person.”
Obviously language preferences such as these may vary, but it is probably best to err on the side of caution. While you don’t need to write a Pulitzer prize winning essay, there is no substitute for a clearly written profile.
Express Yourself and Your Interests
A good online dating profile is a window into your personality. Interests, passions, quirks and humour go a long way here. Nobody wants to go out with someone they have nothing in common with.
Shared interests are a key way to start a conversation and to determine whether you might be interested in meeting the other person. “I once used music as a peg, started a conversation and things carried on from there,” says a Bangalore-based Floh member.
There is value in being specific. It is almost a staple in our generation to include a love for travel in one’s online profile, but the target market for an all-inclusive resort vacation will differ from a yoga retreat or an art history tour. Obviously we can enjoy more than one of these types of things, but it never hurts to expand on this, to give someone a better idea of who you are.
A touch of your own sense of humour will help a reader understand if you’ll find the same things funny, and adds a lot of charm. “A bit of quirkiness always helps. If the whole thing has a small theme/story around how it is written/being told, even better.” adds another Bangalore-based member.
Sell, But Don’t Oversell!
While online profiles are, lets face it, marketing in a way, one should not go overboard. You are a person not an innovative new kitchen appliance.
“I sometimes come across profiles where people boast about their achievements and places they’ve visited,” says a Bangalore Floh member. “Good for them, maybe, but nobody wants to date a show-off.”
While we are sure that your list of accomplishments is impressive, they can make great stories you can share over time. Be mindful of how too much boasting may be taken in the online context. Make yourself feel good without weirding the other person out.
Ultimately however, remember that online dating can sometimes elude even the basic steps followed above. These rules can have exceptions – some of you with blank profiles may find love, and others may fall head over heels for the SMS-English – ultimately all you can do is build an online dating profile that is the best representation of you.
Have any hacks that you think should be on this list? Let us know in the comments below!
